Merry Christmas! Sorry I missed you in December. Our Hawaii trip made Christmas come quickly and had me extra busy when we got back. Hawaii was great. It was perfect. I had three days to myself which were so refreshing. I did a lot of walking (shopping), pool sitting, people watching, and a little bit of reading and swimming. The weather was nice but rainy, so it was hard to hang out on the beach because it would suddenly get windy and rainy. But I couldn't complain because I mean, I was in Hawaii! Tim and I had two days together and we packed them with lots of sightseeing. We had so much fun. When we got home the kids said they didn't even miss us. Then we got into Christmas mode! This Christmas season was so much fun! The boys were so excited and counted down every day. Micah loved driving around at night and looking at Christmas lights and Ben kept telling me that we didn't have enough Christmas decorations. This year it was just the 5 of us for Christmas. We missed family but it was actually very nice to just be us this year. It was more relaxing and we were able to enjoy it more. Christmas eve we made it to church and then came home and had a big dinner. The kids each got one present. Ben helped put out cookies and eggnog for Santa (which the dog ate as soon as we went up stairs). Once the kids were in bed Tim and I spent Christmas eve watching A Christmas Story and eating cookies and gave each other one present, it was perfect. Christmas morning the kids did not wake up all excited, I don't know if they forgot it was Christmas or what, but when I heard them talking I went in and reminded them. They were excited to see all of the presents under the tree and kept making sure there were actually presents for them. Maelyn was actually excited for presents this year. She was so cute opening them. She would get excited but then open it really slowly and cautiously and wait for us to show it to her. We always open stockings first, and then eat breakfast and then open presents. The kids didn't like having to stop opening and playing in order to eat, but the did. We tried to maintain some order to opening presents and I tried to get pictures of each present for family who sent them, but by the second present for each kid we just let them go and stopped taking too many pictures in order to just enjoy the moment. It was a wonderful Christmas. We are so blessed.
Looking back on 2016 it is hard to believe how much growth and healing our family has been through. The kids have grown so much. Ben just gets smarter and smarter. Micah is healing and getting more energy and personality everyday. Maelyn is growing and walking and developing her personality! I personally feel like a completely different person than I was a year ago. For me 2016 was my year of healing. In 2016 we didn't have any hospital stays. My kids were all healthy and 'normal'. We didn't have any big life changes (no moves, no babies). It was weird! But I used it to regroup. My word of the year was life, and it was so fitting. I came back to life, I found hope in life, and we just lived life! 2016 was not without it's stresses and disappointments, but after what we've walked through the last 4 years we feel more equipped to handle what life throws at us. I've learned to enjoy everyday, take in every moment of my kids and recognize the miracles and blessings around me. I've learned to fear less and trust God more. And that is what life is about.
As I look forward into the new year, knowing Maelyn has a very major surgery coming, I am looking at it through my new lens. I no longer am walking into fear and dread and uncertainty. I'm able to look forward with hope, knowing that God is good. He will provide, He will protect, He will make all things right, because He can be trusted to keep His promises. I've known my word for 2017 for a while now. And I feel like this ones going to stick as my word for the rest of my life. Joy. 2016 taught me what joy really means. Joy is not a fleeting emotion. Joy never ends. Joy is never depleted. Because God is Joy. God is MY joy. And the joy of the Lord is my strength. 2017 is not going to be easy. I am not looking forward to surgery and recovery. It is going to be hard and horrible, but I know that God will provide us the strength to get through it, and that is my joy.
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